WELCOME TO MOONJELLY

It's almost the mew year. Make sure you slurp a long noodle for good luck. See ya later 2018, you've been real. -j

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart. A modern retelling of a Christmas classic. When the cute, wolf-print sweater that you got for your husband fits perfectly, looks great on him, and he thinks it looks dope, but it weirdly smells like armpit... Last Christmas, I gave you a sweater, but it smelled weird, so the very next day, we gave it away. And by that, I mean that we went back to the store to exchange or return it or something. -j

Going to see the Christmas lights on a day that has a high wind advisory... "Oh, look at these lights. They're shaped like a flamingo." "Cool." "It's damn cold." "Yea. Oh, look, there's a Christmas slug over there. He's leaving a trail of Christmas slime." "Cool." "Yea." .... "It's really freaking cold." "Oh look, more lights." "Cute." "Cute." "Let's get some cold stone and go home now." "Let's go home and door dash some cold stone." "Now you're talking, baby." -j

The best Christmas helper is always a cat. Who needs an elf, when a domestic feline is so readily available to offer Christmas assistance? Especially in the gift wrapping department! Today as I attempted to wrap a few Christmas presents, my honorable cat stepped up to test the sturdiness of various cardboard boxes by jumping in each one and vigorously rubbing her face against the edges. Gotta make sure the box holds up against minor shock. Then we have wrapping paper. Wrappin

The cold weather has made my hands extremely dry. So dry that the skin on some of my fingers is cracking. It's gross. Super gross. So the other night, I was looking for gloves to wear overnight, so that I can lotion up my hands and lock in the moisture. I couldn't find any, so my husband grabbed his gloves from the car. They're a pair of warm, black gloves. "Are you sure? I'm going to get them all lotiony," I said. He insisted, so I put them on. Got under the covers. Kitty cu

Chloe is the new proud owner of a cocoa cafe. The first yelp reviews are grim. Apparently, the ‘cat at the window’ is ‘the cutest cat ever,’ but has a ‘horrible attitude,’ and the cocoa tastes like a ‘cup of watery gravy.’ Also, the almond chocolate logs were ‘super suspicious.’ Weird. Let’s cross our fingers for Chloe’s business venture. -j