Anekodote 02 - Spider Patrol


Here's a fun test. When you're at home, scream at the top of your lungs and see who comes running to your rescue. The one who responds first is the one who loves you most.

In my case, it's my cat who comes speeding down the hallway to see what's up. Coming in second place is my husband who comes running around the corner, saying, "Babe! What what what?!" Who loves me more? I mean, I don't want to name names, but it's probably my cat.

Granted, she is impressively fast. So this test might not yield accurate findings, but it's still fun.

The other day, I tried to take on a spider on my own. It was on the wall. I folded up a magazine and gave it a good whack.. It fell to the floor, convulsing, which made me scream in terror. It's like, I know it's going to fall. What other outcome could occur? Still I find it so terrifying when it moves, even as a result of my own doing.

So I scream.

And my dutiful cat comes zooming toward me, mewing something that sounds like, "ARE YOU OKAY?!" And in those bounding steps, she manages to run over the spider as she arrives at my feet. She has vanquished the enemy without even knowing. She has come to my rescue, my valiant spider buster with her quick as lightning paws and honor immeasurable.

Good girl.

Then my husband enters the room, kinda sorta sluggishly. "Babe. What happened?"

"Nothing. We have it under control. You are not needed here, sir."

"Why you screaming like a crazy person.."

"Actually, Chloe just saved my life. She's stepping on a spider right now. In this very moment. It's dying under her weight."

"Good girl, Chloe. What a good girl."

She's looking up at me, still unsure if I'm actually okay. I pet her face and pick her up to reveal a dead-as-can-be spider embedded into the carpet. My husband grabs a napkin to dispose of the fallen arachnid and says, "It is finished."

Who loves me more? It's a good question to ask yourself. Take stock of your loved ones and evaluate who will be there in your time of need. Those that don't make the cut? Well, maybe you don't really need them in your life. I mean, if they're not going to rescue you from a spider, will they rescue you from anything at all? Think about it.

-j

thank you, love you, xoxo ✨

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