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Olivia Rodrigo Is Super Cute And Talented, But Is She Working For Big Sticker?

Big Sticker has been trying to get us to wear a lot of stickers on our faces for years.


SOUR album cover © Geffen Records (fair use), photo of author via Rodrigo's Instagram filter

Call me cheugy if you must. I have fallen under Olivia Rodrigo’s spell. She can sing, and she will not let her ex forget his transgressions against her. Strawberry ice cream in Malibu? THAT WAS THEIR THING. My only concern— we must prepare ourselves for the possibility she’s just a pawn in Big Sticker’s secret plot to get us to wear a lot of stickers on our faces. And one on our tongue.


Big Sticker may have been behind everything. The casting of High School Musical: The Musical: The Series. The subconscious pairing of Olivia and whoever that boy was. The record deal. The album cover art concept: stickers. Stickers all over the face.


Seems a little suspicious to me, that’s all I’m going to say. I don’t want Big Sticker coming after me.


If I suddenly stop posting on this blog, you can assume that they’ve gotten to me. If you’re reading this, you’re in danger too.


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